Coloring inside the lines

Another lesson from the kids about obedience, and a little about ADD.

When I was a kid, I noticed that it was important to my Dad that I color inside the lines. I didn’t remember it though until what I call his “second fleet” came along when he married and had kids with another woman after my parents divorced. I watched him badger his boys about their drawing, saying things like “that’s not what clouds look like” as though this little 9-year-old had forgotten to lock the back door. It was wrong for him to color the way he was.

Something inside me hurt for him, and for my inner child I guess. I love my dad, but something inside him makes it difficult for him to be forgiving of imperfection. He’s improving, definitely, but it has been good for me to see this side of him now, as an adult.

At the time, AJ was a baby, but I swore I’d never make her color inside the lines when she was older. I told myself I was more free than that, that I would let her have her freedom to color anywhere she wanted (on paper, of course).

But this morning, I moved back to the middle on this issue when I was coloring with AJ after breakfast. She saw me coloring carefully inside the lines and said she wanted to try and how was I doing it.

I showed her how I go slow and draw softly around the lines first, and then relax as I color in the rest. It was like magic to her and she wanted to try it too. As I was coloring, an idea occurred to me.

Coloring inside the lines is a good thing!

So we chatted about how the lines are boundaries, a lot like rules for her, the law for me, and God’s word for all of us. When we learn to concentrate and stay focused on the lines, it gets easier to follow them.

Side note to myself (and you), it also allows use special insight into when it is okay to move a bit outside the boundaries. But of course, that takes time, experience, and wisdom.

And kids want to emulate us!

It’s amazing how going about our lives can inspire our kids to learn. When I’m reading a book, AJ wants to read too. When I’m eating healthy, she’ll ask if she can try some. And when I watch TV or eat junk food…

So coloring inside the lines, following boundaries, eating right, being honest, all the things we want our kids to do… we have to do them first!

It also doesn’t hurt those leaning toward ADD to have a way to focus the brain on something constant and defined. It’s why I carry a sudoku book with me everywhere. I can’t function well unless my brain is constantly active. I actually read a book while I eat for the same reason. The act of eating itself is an incessant bore and I would go stir crazy if I wasn’t DOING something while eating.

Likewise, coloring inside the lines is helping my distractible little girl to stay focused on one thing for 2-3 whole minutes. :)

So, hippie mom that I typically am, I’m learning the value of simple and discreet boundaries that don’t bind us, but rather free us because sometimes it helps to have a few things decided for us!

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Copyright © 2010 Natalie Jost