Setting boundaries for enquiries

I’ve recently been inspired to write up a “FAQ](/faq/ for some of the questions I’ve been getting more of lately. This is in no way because of any particular client or reader, it’s just something a friend advised me to do when I complained of the types of questioning I was seeing.

I love to help where I can, and I don’t usually having a problem answering quick questions here and there, but I will ask you to pay me consulting time if it’s something that’s going to take away time from my family and my other billable work.

Some tips on asking for help

As my blog has grown in readership I have fielded much more email messages with often very basic questions about CSS, photoshop and other web design methods. I enjoy teaching, but like anyone, I have bills to pay, so here are some guidelines for asking help of web designers on the web (or any professional).

Maribel Hernandez has written a short sort of primer for questioning called “Engage the Trivium Mind by Questioning](http://apmformulators.com/?p=339 in which she says,

“A hasty question may get you a hasty answer or none at all. The more you take the time to demonstrate in your question that you really tried to find an answer the more likely someone may answer.”

For me, I’d say that’s my only real pre-requisite is that you have done your own research and have genuinely tried to do something yourself and you’re just stuck. Show me that you respect me as a professional and you’ve spent time trying to find the answer on your own and I’ll likely go out of my way to get you the answer.

What to say and what not to say

**No: ??Hey, you don’t know me but I love your work. How do I…?? This isn’t cool because it’s assuming I’m sitting on my thumbs waiting for someone to come along and ask me a question – and you’re kissing up. **Yes: ??Hi, Natalie, I really appreciate you taking your free time to blog about things that are important to me. Do you know of a place I could find out how to…?? See there, you’re not directly asking me to do the work for you, you just want a bread crumb to lead you in the right direction. In this case I would probably answer the question AND point to resources. And, you’re not so much kissing up but showing genuine respect for me. **No: ??I’ve been looking everywhere for the answer for this, but can you just tell me how to…?? Yes, but exactly WHERE is “everywhere”? And what are you doing to help yourself? Are you asking me to just give you code that you can copy/paste and never learn a thing from? **Yes: ??I’ve read _____ article at A List Apart and I’ve tried to put it into action, but I think I’m missing a step. Here’s what I’ve done… [explanation of steps taken to meet objective] and this is what I’d like to do… [explanation of objective] Can you point me to any other resources that might help me figure this out??? I love this kind of question and I’ll probably bend over backwards to help you the first free moment I have.

I really don’t want to discourage you from asking for help because I really do love to help. The problem is I love it so much I can end up doing a ton of work for free if I don’t lay out some boundaries. So, ask away, but if I find the answer anywhere within my website where you could have already read the answer, I’ll reach through cyberspace and smack you.

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